The Watering Hole

Look towards the future instead of at the past. Thats exactly what my goals were all about. Focus me on the future. Could not of put it any better than that and thats the best advise in the world right now!!!

Just remember, sheep can't cook.  ;)

He must eat takeout all the time then.   :)

Hookbender — Nov 10, 2013Look towards the future instead of at the past. Thats exactly what my goals were all about. Focus me on the future. Could not of put it any better than that and thats the best advise in the world right now!!!

Hookbender — Nov 08, 2013Man if your thinking stuff like that, you need to go to the doc, seriously. Right now, you need to take your own advice. Critical thinking, logic, reason. Use that now, and find strength in those wonderful kids you have. In 6 months you'll be so much better. You just have to get through the shock of what happened, deal with it the best you can, and build yourself a new life.

I've been in therapy almost a year. I trust science. :)

Look at it as a new beginning. Turn the page. Make it exciting. Sit down and make a list of stuff to do. When you finish the list, start another one. Put lots of fun stuff on the list. Stay outside as much as possible. Take up golf, or something that gets you outside. Try your best to stay busy. The more you sit around and think about this shit, the longer it will take to get over it. And look, none of it has to include women. Just take some tripper time.

That's what I've been trying to do, actually. It's been pretty fun.

I gave myself one year to do whatever I wanted. But I had one goal I was working toward the entire time. Getting a house, and at that time, start a new life. My next goal is to fix this house up a bit, little at a time, sell it, and get another one. As long as interest rates stay low, that is. My ultimate goal is to live on a lake. Stuff like that to get you focused on things you can control and work toward, get excited about.

I'm just learning to just be me. That seems to be enough of a challenge. :)

I hope this doesn't sound like advice, it's more a list of ideas that I hope will help you. Just a few things that helped me out during the hell part of this crap I'm dealing with. I probably wouldn't say this to most here, but I consider you a friend and and anything I say to you concerning this matter is truly out of concern for you.

Anyway, best of luck to you and if you ever need someone to cuss out, talk to, whatever, just pm me and I'll send you me cell #.

Take care!!

Thanks, man. It's appreciated. :)
Tripper

Please excuse the corny thought - but I'm glad to see this thread stay positive and not become a doom and gloom "run far, run fast" type thing.  

"Type Thing".  ;D

Dude, you run far and fast all the time.  So we figure you know what you're doing.

Ha! Thanks.

marriage ain't always milk and cookies.  It takes work.  Like I said, you get out of it what you put into it.  Sometimes that other person completes you and keeps you grounded.

Example:  I had no idea that I was a work-o-holic.  But I am.  I can spend an obscene amount of time at work.  No that I'm the principal, I don't want my school to fail.  I put the time in.  One day, I get home and it's like 8:00 at night (work day ends at 3:00) and my wife informs me that the boy child is in Cub Scouts and they are camping this weekend (as in tomorrow).  I'm like, "Who's taking him?"  

She's like, "You are."

I'm all, "I totally was going to work this weekend.  I have so much stuff I am working on."

She's like, "Guess you can do it Monday.  Your son is going camping this weekend.  You're taking him."

I was so pissed.  But she was right.  They are only young once.  I ended up going and had a blast with the boy child.  I came back so relaxed.

The fact that she can call me to the carpet and keep grounded is worth the price of admission.  She knows how to balance me out.  

You find that one that bends for you and teaches you how to bend also.....it's a big deal.

I'm a hard ass.  I'm difficult to put up with on certain things.  I can be very polemic on what I think is right and what should be done.  She has a way of getting through all that, challenging me and at the end of the day she still loves me for me.  

In 15 years we've been ready to throw in the towel a few times.  We've been ready to kill the other one.  people fight.  shit happens.  If you really love each other, you swallow that pride and you make it right.  We don't go to bed mad.  We fight till dawn if that is what is required.  But we fight because we need to have harmony or we just can't rest.  I don't want to be mad at her or her me.  But it happens.  

Don't brush things under the rug.  Deal with it head on and do it together.  

When all else fails.....fuck.  Don't say, "Fuck it."

Just fuck.  That usually fixes everything! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

I'm not living with someone I have to argue with. And if a woman yells at me, and or cusses me during that fix, their gone. I think at that point,  she's lost respect for me so fuck her. JMO.

I don;t think, at my age with my experiences, I'll ever give up my freedom and peace for a woman again. Hell, I'm happy now, a woman just fucks all that up.  ;D